We don’t often feature funny quotes on Wealthy Gorilla, but after compiling this list, I’ll make an exception. When you fall, I will be there to catch you – With love, the floor. Maureen Dowd, “If you don’t design your own life plan, chances are you’ll fall into someone else’s plan. You’ll have to use the stairs… One step at a time.“ She's ninety-seven now, and we don't know where the hell she is. Ellen Degeneres, “Failure is the condiment that gives success its flavor.“ - Super-successful lemon farmer- prontopup â@prontopup, The biggest sin is sitting on your ass.- Florynce Kennedy, To succeed in life, you need two things: ignorance and confidence.- Mark Twain, The road to success is dotted with many tempting parking spaces. For this very reason, we’ve created the following collection of absolutely funny inspirational quotes. When you’re motivated to the teeth, you’ll be able to continuously push your own limits. Funny Ronald Reagan quotes that favor the flavor of his self-deprecating wit. Funny voting quotes and funny election quotes: elect to keep smiling! Here, the list of funny failure Quotes: Your bike is being old and damage, God had gifted you two legs step up by walking. - Lou Holtz, If you want to get somewhere in life, you need to know three things: where you came from, where youâre going, and where your wife left the car keys.- Raymond Lesser, Buying a slurpee from the captain of my high school football team about five years after graduation was one of my lifeâs highlights.- Ruminations.com, Northwesternâs alumni list is truly impressive. Be happy and walk to a destiny. “You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold the America's Cup, France is accusing the U.S. of arrogance, Germany doesn't want to go to war, and the three most powerful men in America are named "Bush", "Dick", and "Colin." Explore 1000 Successful Quotes by authors including William James, Albert Schweitzer, and Abraham Lincoln at BrainyQuote. I love being married. The following funny motivational quotes are both inspiring and humorous. One-liners, short success quotes, sayings, thoughts and captions for your bio, social status, self-talk, motto, mantra, signs, posters, wallpapers, backgrounds. "A conservative is a man who believes that nothing should be done for the first time." Success is made up of courage, brains, and luck. Success didn't spoil me, I've always been insufferable. Fathers Day jokes: Daddy, Pops, whatever you call him, he deserves a good laugh. Joke Game For Hilarious Party Fun. Inspirational Funny Quotes. Ron White, “I have a simple philosophy: Fill what’s empty. During such difficult times, we all can make good use of something that quickly motivates us in a powerful manner. We look at them now and see responsible citizens, self-reliant adults, successful members of the business community, outstanding performers, and just happy people. (Say that fast - it's funny.) Marie von Ebner-Eschenbach, “Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work.“ To fly, we have to have resistance. To change that, have a look at our funny lines “All right everyone, line up alphabetically according to your height.” Share the best funny quotes and sayings collection by famous authors and comedians. From rickety leadership to entropic working styles, the business world, like real life, is shaded with chuckles. “believing in negative thoughts is the single greatest obstruction to success.” Funny positive attitude quotes “Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day; teach a man to fish and he’ll eat forever.” 'Get up early, work late - and strike oil.'. You can go a lot farther with a smile and a gun.- Al Capone, An actorâs success has the life expectancy of a small boy about to look into a gas tank with a lighted match.- Fred AllenThe penalty for success is to be bored by the people who used to snub you.- Nancy Astor, Honesty pays, but it doesn't seem to pay enough to suit some people. You realize that you control your own destiny.”. 5) Dreams are like rainbows…Only idiots follow them. But not funny at all except the first one. This world does not need followers. I owe my success to having listened respectfully to the very best advice, and then going away and doing the exact opposite. Your level of motivation will also determine whether or not you’re able to continuously force yourself to do whatever it takes. funny inspirational quotes about life and happiness “Successful and unsuccessful people do not vary greatly in their abilities.” 1. Thank you. Since the first two are a function of the third, it's pretty much all luck. Dalai Lama, “Consider the postage stamp: its usefulness consists in the ability to stick to one thing ’til it gets there.“ Tibetan Proverb. I might as well take a nap.â- Carrie Fisher, If at first you don't succeed, failure may be your style.- Quentin CrispOnce you are dead, you are made for life.- Jimi Hendrix, In looking for people to hire, you look for three qualities: integrity, intelligence, and energy. Michael Korda Click to tweet Funny Success QuotesGroup 1. “I cannot give you the formula for success, but I can give you the formula for failure which is: Try to please everybody.”. You have feet in your shoes. Unknown, “All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence, and then success is sure.“ And guess what they have planned for you? Ellen DeGeneres. The road to success is dotted with many tempting parking spaces. Robert Downey Jr. “Nothing is impossible, the word itself says ‘I’m possible’!“ 4) Cupcakes are muffins that belived in miracles. “I have a lot of growing up to do. Robert Bresson, “I intend to live forever. I hope you enjoyed this collection of funny motivational quotes. "Itâs true that hard work never killed anybody, but I figure, why take the chance?" At the same time, getting motivated and maintaining a high level of determination doesn’t have to be a serious undertaking. "Do not take life too seriously. Benjamin Franklin, “Talent hits a target no one else can hit. It is a toy balloon among children armed with pins. What is so beautiful about funny motivational quotes is that they stem from authors who themselves were confronted with challenges that often seemed larger-than-life. Love writing but hate the trials and tribulations that come with it? - Will RogersNo one has ever drowned in sweat. You must learn from the mistakes of others. Most of the time we can also relate to it. It takes everything to stand alone.” Will Rogers, “Well-behaved women seldom make history.“ - William Lyon Phelps. Nothing is impossible for the man who doesn't have to do it himself. So let’s have a look at their funny and inspiring realizations. Winston Churchill, “If you hang out with chickens, you’re going to cluck and if you hang out with eagles, you’re going to fly.“ Roger Staubach, “Edison failed 10,000 times before he made the electric light. Funny Sayings. Here are some of the best funny and inspirational quotes … If you love what you are doing, you will be successful." Rockefeller once explained the secret of success. Joe Girard, “There are no traffic jams along the extra mile.“ Do not be discouraged if you fail a few times.“ Groucho Marx, “The key to success is not through achievement, but through enthusiasm.“ (Say that fast - it's funny.) If at first you don't succeed, find out if the loser gets anything. Robert Benchley, “It takes sunshine and rain to make a rainbow. I just found 100 ways to do it wrong.“ Day Hell Walking. You have to go after it with a club.” View the list My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. 1. “You can’t wait for inspiration. These Short funny quotes & images will seriously make you laugh out loud! “Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt.”. Martin Meadows, “Here is a test to find whether your mission on earth is finished: If you’re alive, it isn’t.“ The problem is that most people have the self-doubt station in their heads turned up way too loud to hear it.” If at first you don't succeed, find out if the loser gets anything. “I am so clever that sometimes I don’t understand a single word of what I am saying.” Oscar Wilde 5. I'm sick of following my dreams. Yes, that’s right. Even further, who doesn’t love the powerful and inspirational effects of motivational quotes? 30 Famous Success Quotes . Early to bed and early to rise is a bad rule for any one who wishes to become acquainted with our most prominent and influential people. This blog is all about personal development and the ambition to create a lifestyle full of joy, happiness, consciousness and success. View our collection of the 65 best short and funny motivational quotes to inspire you. Scratch where it itches.“ (No Credentials Whatsoever). Remember, it doesn't matter whether you win or lose; what matters is whether I win or lose.- Darrin Weinberg, Nothing is more humiliating than to see idiots succeed in enterprises we have failed in.- Gustave Flaubert, In this business you either sink or swim or you don't. unique to this site, and may only be used with permission. Henry Wadsworth, “The road to success is dotted with many tempting parking spaces.“ Wayne W. Dyer, “People often say that motivation doesn’t last. That’s why we’ve compiled the following selection of truly funny motivational quotes. The prize will not be sent to you. 'Get up early, work late - and strike oil. If you combine motivation with something to laugh about, you’ll get a powerful mixture. The Joke Game is the EASIEST way to have a hilarious party. '- Joey AdamsTo succeed in the world it is not enough to be stupid, you must also be well-mannered.- VoltaireEagles may soar high, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.- John BenfieldI've often said, the only thing standing between me and greatness is me.- Woody AllenPeople who have no weaknesses are terrible; there is no way of taking advantage of them.- Anatole France, You can go a long way with a smile. You won’t achieve any kind of success without a lot of work and a some sacrifice. Audrey Hepburn, “If you’re going to be thinking, you may as well think big.“ Funny Quotes. You do not blame them on your mother, the ecology, or the president. Here we share the best funny life quotes about life and sayings “You don’t get to choose how you’re going to die. - William Lyon PhelpsI'm sick of following my dreams. Quotes tagged as "funny" Showing 1-30 of 8,318. Or, as his wife would have it, an idiot.- Douglas AdamsShe's the kind of girl who climbed the ladder of success, wrong by wrong.- Mae West, You must learn from the mistakes of others. Funny Jokes. Dec 26, 2020 - Explore Chris Thomas's board "Success meme" on Pinterest.
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